Sunday, November 19, 2006

Would It Be Different?

I visited Aron yesterday after Philosophy class. He moved to M.Pionierskaya with Hosein. The place was a typical bachelors' apartment. How do I start. I suppose Reena is right, his world fell apart the day I left him. Its true. The Aron now isnt the boyfriend I had for 3 years plus *shakes my head*

We went to the supermarket to get some stuff for dinner, some snacks and beverages. His place is reasonably spacious, Hosein takes the living room while he gets the bedroom. Very messy bedroom. Dusty, DVDs scattered on the floor, dirty laundry piled up at the corner, unmade bed, just shocked me since I remember him as a neat person. But then again, I was the one who cleaned all the time.

Then he mumbled something I least expected, "Did I tell you I have a girlfriend?". Oooohhhh. I was relieved to hear that! It means he had gotten over us but the more I poked, the more I realised that he hasnt. I was curious about his relationship so I asked general questions like how they met, how long has it been, about her etc. He seemed embarassed and avoided to answer. He showed me pictures of her, none of them together with the excuse she hasnt sent them over. I was like.. okay.

That girlfriend of his is much younger than I. Looks so young it aint funny. What was he thinking! She had her hair dyed red. RED. Thats my colour. She looks like a mouse. I AM the mouse. I dont mean to be perasan but it was obvious hes looking for a replacement. He said to me again, "I am sorry I fucked up". I smiled and assured him thats a long time ago to which he replied "For you, yes but for me it isnt". I decided to keep quiet.

Then I thought about my life. Living with Reena and Jason, the lifestyle, many good things that happened.. Aron and I have become very different. These fellas have become organic junkies.. my goodness, the excitement when they talk about the breed. Things from the old apartment which I brought from home, he kept them. ALL of it. Old spices, cutleries okay since theyre usable but empty lotion tube, tablecloths but expired stuff too?

I really didnt know how to react when he deliberately showed me. He still tries to impress me and prolly hopeful for a second chance but the more I see them, the more I know its impossible. I am glad I ended our rotten relationship. Perhaps if we were still together, he wouldnt be in the state he is right now. Shame but true *sighhh*

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