Saturday, May 13, 2006

Baby Me

Boss, Reena and I watched Syriana around 11pm to which I dozed off after an hour or so (boring movielerrr) Guess what. I woke up around 340am and not feeling sleepy AT ALL! Boss and Reena are really concern but its definitely not the apt-shifting or sleeping on the divan/couch bed. I am just stressed out, really stressed out since I never do!

So I came online. Khalid msged me on MSN. I havent heard from him since he fucked up his first paper on Tuesday. He called me Baby and Muuuaahhhh-ed but honestly, I became confused. I couldnt express any form of affection, my texts were plainer than plain. He stated "Well I guess things really have changed". It was obvious from my side because I am so undeclared to him. Here is my point of view:
  1. I cant be with a guy who doesnt love me, let alone if he doesnt even know if he does
  2. He has obligation to his family so I accept/respect that but he cant assure me anything
  3. It is better to hurt me alone than a group of people much closer to him
  4. I dislike his "Everything Once" principle. Id say its utter crap, very unfair to apply
  5. I have no courage to have more faith in us and that shows how insecure I am

    If Khalid decides to speak to me after his exams about our situation, I would really like to hear it but I seriously hope he would be clear of his feelings for me. I still say its my own disappoinment because I expect more than what he can give. Anyways I dont want to hear his Sorry anymore. Feelings are extreme- it is either YES or NO. Agreed?

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